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All the characters, incidents and places in the following post  are fictitious. Resemblance to any person living or dead or any incident or place is purely coincidental.

Ohk it all started like this we had just shifted our base to Chennai and Mom was pestering Dad to resume the cable connection as she had left her serials at a point where missing even one episode may result in a massive rise in Blood pressure. I had been lazing around and Hibernating the entire day and as a ritual Dad loved shaking me from my slumber as soon as he returned from office. I dragged myself in those faded jeans without even washing my face or tying my hair, looking like one of those ghosts from paranormal activity and cursing Dad for forcing me to accompany him on our quest to bring Tulsi and parvati back(they are famous creations of ekta kapoor !!! )

The “AIRTEL –express yourself” office housed many counters and many customers buzzing around impatiently. We were allotted the token number 261 which was like a zillion light years from the current token number 100. We made ourselves comfortable on the couch which magically happened to pull my Dad into a parallel universe named ‘sleep’. I sat musing at the 5 year old kids playing temple run and the senior citizens chanting hanuman chalisa only to be disturbed at that moment when the universe conspired to freeze my heart beat, he enters the room, removes his dark helmet and lifts his face to look around. Smart, Handsome or sexy were words too shallow to describe him .He was classically divine, with some slight touch of makeup he would have made the apt looking Krishna or Ram in any Indian mythology serial.  He got his token and settled down to watch CNN IBN,and all this while I had been gaping at him like one of those apes from “The planet of apes” and his indifference towards me was as cold as Iceland.

And every now and then he made my heart skip a beat by getting up to offer a seat to an old gentleman or bending down to give back the coins that had slipped from the purse of one of the fat aunties. While I was loyally following the tag line “Express yourself” my eyes following where ever he went, he turned suddenly looking directly into my eyes and asked “do you have a pen”. My mind  flunked unable to register an iota of what he spoke.

“Pen ………do you have a pen” he gesticulated

My Dad Indeed had one but I felt it was inappropriate to disturb him or to be more honest I dint want him to disturb “us”.

“No” I replied my voice quivering

The uncle next to me got up to leave and he came over swiftly and sat by my side.

“I ‘ve come to get a microsim, my new mobile doesn’t support the normal one” he said in a tone like we had known each other for years

I responded with a silly smile as I was busy trying to figure out as to why a guy like him would even notice an average looking girl who was at her ugliest best that day. That left me with only one embarrassing explaination,may be I had way too much “expressed myself” generating a pinch of sympathy in him.

“So what have you come for and what’s your token number”

“Oh mine is 261 and I am here for ……….. “

“Hey wait looks like you lost track ,look  270 is running now  next is my turn gotta go “he smiled and left

Embarrassed at my stupidity to have not kept track of the number, woke up Dad and went to the DTH counter. I promised myself to never look at him again but I guess girls are born with this mechanism to be able to sense a gaze on them and to my surprise I found him stealing glances at me. While my dad was busy arguing with the sales representative, like some kind of an unsaid custom we would smile at each other whenever our eyes met and gestured asking whether the other was done.

“You know this is going to take time and it’s too crowded here you better go and sit on the couch “my dad said

The very next moment I found myself sitting on the former spot and he besides me  juggling with a couple of Xerox copies of PAN card, address proof and the usual jazz.

“Airtel services are so pathetic seriously,…  you’ve come for DTH right? " and then he went on and on about how he had been roaming around for 2 weeks now to get the work done ,while I was trying to get a glimpse of the name on the Xerox copy of the PAN card .

“The sim is not on my name…….. “he blurted and I felt a sudden spasm of embarrassment  making my  face go red  “SHITT……..EXPRESSED MYSELF WAY TOO MUCH AGAIN“I thought.

“that’s why it’s getting troublesome  for me to procure a microsim on the same name in that person’s absence ” he continued and I heaved a sigh of relief though it was quiet evident he found out.

“Are you from North India or do you belong to Chennai you don’t seem tamil ?” he asked

“Actually I am a kannadiga born in  Chennai  and I am quiet fluent in Tamil” I dint know why I added the second line may be in a pursuit to impress him ,as by then I found out that he is tamil speaking.

“oh that’s great nanage swalpa swalpa kannada gothu(I know little bit of kannada)” he replied in his usual charming tone.

“So where do you live ?”he asked

“OH WOAHHH NOW THIS IS GETTING PERSONAL” I thought

“T.Nagar “ I replied promptly ,I was disappointed with  my lack of presence of mind why was I telling him everything while I was supposed to be taking it slowly.

“Oh I too stay around here “he replied there was a brief pause then came “So may I know your 

name ?”

“Lavanya” came the reply

SHITTT LAVANYA COMMON WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU ?? YOU WERE  THE NO NONSENSE RIGID GIRL WHOM GUYS ARE SCARED TO APPROACH my inner conscience yelled at me. Had it been for any other guy in his place I would have either dodged the question or would have faked my name but no this guy was capable of dissolving my brain and rational.

“You know I gotta go bbye” I said getting up abruptly and hurried to the counter where my Dad was busy scribbling forms and never turned towards him until we left .

Before we left I shot a brief glance at him and he was not looking at me rendering me  expressionless as I left from the ‘AIRTEL-EXPRESS YOURSELF’ center and my mind was left  suspended amidst thoughts like OH WAS I TOO RUDE …NAAH YOU WERE SO EXPLICIT ,MAKING HIM THINK THAT YOU ARE TOO EASY AND VULNERABLE.NO NO HE SEEMS NICE ATLEAST COULD HAVE ASKED HIS NAME  …………………………………

Message from the heavens-Part 3

“Who was it draupadi ?”

  Who was it ? Who was it …………………….. the words just fumbled its way randomly Only to be disturbed with a sudden  jolt ….. “Mom what’s wrong with you” .Shakti woke up with a start to find her daughter leaning over her with utter bafflement ."Mom stop hallucinating  and for god’s sake make it on time at least today ,it’s your day" 17 year old Srishti spoke. Shakti kissed her daughter morning and immediately jumped out of the bed to get ready and was soon racing past the marine drive with her daughter beside her in the car. “Mom why on earth that every time you pass through marine drive you go into this sudden state of dejavu?” Shakti did not answer she just smiled away to look at the far reaches of the horizon hoping to get a glimpse of any hint that might help her unravel  the mystery of what had transpired  that night 20 years ago. She was never able to tell whether it was a dream or not but she starkly remembered what happened later. She was lying on the pavement merrily in a semiconscious state only to be woken up by Safia siddique a young journalist on her way back from work.

She helped Shakti regain her composure and accompanied her to her house where her mother in law had set up a mini inquiry commission to bombard her with questions like “where were you the whole night oops sorry to be more precise whom were you with, and who is this girl  how do you know her?” While all of this was happening Rohit did not utter a word .He saw the drama unfold between the ladies and when he got bored just quietly took his laptop and left for the office saying “I don’t have time for this crap” . Given Shakti’s state of mind she would have taken an extreme step had it not been for Safia’s timely intervention ,“Hey hey ladies relax she was with me the entire night and you must not be knowing this but your daughter in law is a famous blogger and I happened to make friends with here online. As I live nearby marine drive  she called me up when her scooty broke down” . That day marked the beginning of their beautiful companionship something that she never expected will last almost a lifetime”.Safia was with her at each and every step of her life, when her marriage was on rocks, in the delivery room during her 11 hours long labor pain, during the crucial phase when Shakti decided to pursue an MBA after motherhood and when she decided to quit her job to become a social activist. The duo together started a NGO to save helpless women and yet again she will be there on this big day.  The conversation which she had with draupadi and sita transformed her, she did not give up on her marriage and did all she can to make it work ,fulfilled  her duties as a daughter in law and wife with utmost detachment .Srishti was a gift who bought Rohit a bit close to her. If there was anything that he valued the most in his life it was his daughter. Love was something that had been quiet elusive in their relationship but shakti had no complaints because end of the day you either need love or mutual respect to make a marriage work and the couple banked on the latter .They never missed each other or never exchanged words of love but Rohit realized that his wife was different from other women and she wasn’t particularly domestic ,he did not support her in any of  her struggles for MBA or setting up a NGO but  nevertheless did not stop her either and shakti came out of her fantasies of a young bride and decided to accept her position in Rohit’s life without demanding for love. Shakti pulled the car in the parking lot and got down to be greeted by her fans. She looked up at Safia who was standing far away right behind the crowd with the same warm and enigmatic smile making shakti’s mind  replay those last words she had with draupadi

“Who was it draupadi ?”

"Krishna …..who else…….  he  truly was my soulmate, he did not owe me anything ,we were not related, he loved me even when I behaved in the most disgusting way ,he had been supporting me all along  subtly and me immersed in all the worldly illusions  failed to notice it . His love was selfless it never expected me to behave in a certain manner, it never turned into hatred or disappointment when I couldn’t live up to his expectations I was truly his krishnaa”

We all end up finding true love in some form or the other before we die don’t we… shakti reflected and made her way to address the huge gathering that was waiting to celebrate the grand success of her first book “Message from the heavens”

Message from the Heavens -Part 2

The world around her stopped making any sense to shakti “So you guys are immortals or you have been resurrected or are you ghosts hey wait you are not transparent like casper “

“Stop freaking out ok else I will javelin throw you to outer space, like how you threw your chappals.”Draupadi’s hoarse voice spoke

“Relax draupadi you know this is how these mortals react. Ohk now lets get to work”  Sita opened a long parchment that was long enough to carpet the hall of  an Indian 2BHk flat  . “This is a list of your complaints that you have been constantly registering with the  heaven right from the day  you puked cerelac on you’r mother’s sari to this very moment ”

 “ So you guys are here to solve my problems” blurted out shakti

“No shakti we will teach you to solve your own problems” sita spoke with a caressing look

“Do you know how the Ramayan and Mahabharat would have sounded had it been written by a woman”Draupadi asked her with  a jeering look.

“I am sure the Bajrang dal and VHP would have burnt that lady’s idol “

The Heroes would no longer have remained Heroes don't you think so ? The world was praises for the Hero while it failed to acknowledge how a woman’s soul was ripped apart by her very own love. A princess who was the consort of the greatest men of his times  was meted out to such absolute indifference by a society that was inhabited by noble men and you expect the kaliyug to listen to your whining “

“And you still tell all of this without  even the slightest feeling of remorse and hatred”. Shakti was baffled

“Remorse ..no I do not regret loving Ram so madly ,don’t you think it takes a lot of courage to love someone in spite of the absence of the same level of passion from the other side? As for hatred do you think I could have survived those years of captivity and subsequently the years of abandonment by my husband if I had nurtured hatred and frustration within me. I have lived a dignified life, fell in love, learnt to control my mind and stay sane during my captivity , loved myself and lived a complete life, and in the end  detached myself from all human bonds".

Shakti turned to draupadi she was indeed distractingly beautiful …. No wonder why all the five brothers wanted to have her.

“You indeed were the most controversial woman in the trethayug were’nt you ??”

  She laughed ………. “Oh yes wasn’t I the overtly audacious   woman to have married five men and the root cause of one of the bloodiest wars the mankind ever witnessed  "Well that’s how history would remember me"

“No no ….. I dint intend to offend you I am so sorry but I was just curious to know how the assertive and aggressive Draupadi let people have their will on her ”

“What else could I have done I was 16 ,a motherless child devoid of fatherly affection living on the hope of  an overprotective brother  . Kunti gave her final verdict I either had to marry all five of them or I’d be sent back to my so called father as a disgraced woman. Despite my brother’s intense love for me he had to stay tongue tied in front of the royalty”. “I cried ,wailed, created a ruckus and then finally settled down to their agreement under a 16 year old’s delusion that perhaps now I will be cared for and loved by not one but 5 men thereby filling up the void that absence of affection  had created in my childhood” 

 “The rest is the bird’s song that sings on how all the men she trusted and vouched for gambled her soul . You must derive lessons from my life shakti and try to understand how a man’s mind works. 

For men, the softer emotions are always intertwined with power and pride ,they may love you with utmost honesty but there are other things they love more like notions on loyalty,honour and reputation . Yes my husbands did avenge my insult but it was cleverly timed with circumstances that would fetch them fame and heroism”

“Then why did you decide to go on a vanvaas with the pandavas despite their folly and was the void for love ever filled?”

“Vengenance shakti it was vengenance that  aggravated my determination to venture out for that vanvaas I wanted to keep reminding them of how they let me down and it was this very same vengeance that led me to hate myself in the end when I realized that thousands of women were widowed and a million children were left fatherless in the process of extinguishing the raging fire inside me. It was vengeance that distanced me from my karma of being a mother, leaving my children to be cared for by subhadra.Don’t you think that was so selfish of me ??”

 “As for love I was so stupid to have gone searching for it my entire life while it was right there in front of me all long” there was a surreal smile on her face

“Who was it draupadi ?”